The Dickens Special
by Kusco
Summary: When the group is snowed in at Pierce's mansion on Christmas Eve, and Jeff ruins Christmas for everybody, he is visited by three Ghosts that teach him a thing or two about the Holiday Season. Part 2 of my Community Christmas series.
1. The Star-burns brightly shining

_Author's note: I wrote this before season 4 aired. No mention of Intro to Knots... or anything involving the 4th season is involved._

_For Elsiesnuffin_

"And we'll have the hap- hap- happiest Christmas sing Bing Crosby danced with Fred Freaken Estare! Hallelujah! Holy Shit! Where's the Jack Daniels!?"

Jeff stormed off, vaguely hearing Abed muttering something about him misquoting _Christmas Vacation_ but he didn't give a Holiday Rat's Ass. This year was going to be different. This year was going to be good. This year he actually didn't fight Shirley or Abed in their attempts to get the Study Group together for an old fashioned Christmas. There weren't going to be any fist fights, no claymation inspired mental episodes, and no acid trips from dark recesses of Ryan Murphy's fever dreams.

So it was really only fitting that the one time Jeff didn't go kicking and screaming into Christmas oblivion, was the time that it all managed to go to Hell for the simple fact that nothing sucked more than Christmas and all the attempts to make it special just made it all worse. That was the goddamned lesson of the past three Christmases and he was the only one that could see it.

Hell, even Britta of all people, now that she was dating Troy, was sinking into the Christmas pit. Before the evening turned into something out of a disaster movie, he caught her not only stealing a bit of mistletoe from the dean's Christmas outfit, but actually humming 'Baby it's cold outside'; which would have been bad enough if she hadn't been completely off key.

A bit of siding fell off from the entryway as Jeff walked through one of the many hallways in Hawthorne Manor; a testament to how horrible the night had gone. Jeff had no doubt that once everyone else realized the holiday was over, he would get the blame.

Which was of course completely unfair. He didn't invite half the student body to Pierce's house for Christmas! Abed did. He didn't encourage the other half that wasn't invited to come anyway. Pierce did! He didn't get them all snowed in because of a freak blizzard that came out of no where. That was God, or the weatherman; or whoever! The point was it wasn't him!

And yes, he had a bit of a meltdown. But all of that was perfectly understandable. Given the fact that the roads being closed meant he would be spending the night at Pierce's Scooby Doo-esque mansion and not at a bar getting holiday McCallen Neat's. Or the fact that the dean chose that time to announce that the semester which already started late, would be cut short due to problems with Greendale's blazingly incompetent board.

All of that, combined justified every one of Jeff's following actions, including the shouting matches, the knocking over of the Christmas tree, and the over turning of the table holding every conceivable kind of Christmas cookie known to man.

Jeff reached a laundry room and noticed a water cooler in the corner. He'd already apparently hit on some of _Christmas Vacation_, maybe he should really commit to it; though he'd need a chainsaw for that. Either way he crossed the room, filled up a cup of water and took a sip as he stared out the window. His eyes narrowed at the flurries of white snow against the black sky. So much for the damn forecast of clear skies.

After another sip he tossed the paper cup at the wastebasket and missed entirely. Not bothering to pick it up, he turned around and stopped in his tracks. His entire study group stood there in the entryway. Their looks varied from stern, to pissed, to even slightly empathetic.

"What are you guys looking at?" he wiped his lips with the back of his hand. "I couldn't find the liquor cabinet."

"It's in the parlor down the-" Pierce started but Britta elbowed him in the stomach.

"Don't tell him where he can get booze! The last thing we need is to add him getting drunk to this mess!" she said.

"At least that would have been an excuse for the way he behaved!" Annie glared at him. "The Dean is still crying!"

"Good!" Jeff snapped. "You should all be crowding around him and making him feel bad for screwing up, yet again, another semester."

"You need to fix this Jeffery," Shirley said. "We're all upset about everything that happened but you don't see us carrying about and running riot like a bunch of Christmas hating…" she glanced over at the rest of the group and took a breath. "… Grinches…"

"Hey!" Pierce said. "That's racist!"

Jeff just rolled his eyes and started toward the door. The study group didn't budge so he tried going to the side but Shirley blocked that way. He moved to the other side and the group tightened that way too with Troy blocking that entrance too.

"You're not leaving until you agree to help us fix Christmas!" Annie said.

"Fix Christmas?" Jeff turned at her. "Annie, there's no way to 'fix' Christmas! Duncan had it right two years ago! We all put too much meaning into it and it lets us down. Every year like clockwork!"

"Every single Christmas we've had at Greendale has been magical!" Annie snapped back. "It just got a little bit rough at the start!"

"It got magical because we decided to pretend that it wasn't horrible. Well I'm tired of make believing! I'm going to the room Pierce said I could have before my rant and I'm going to sleep this holiday the hell off!"

"I believe what he's trying to say…" Abed jumped in. "…is bah-humbug!"

"Yes Abed, I'm Scrooge now, because trying to get out of a bad situation that actively dumps on you is exactly like being a Victorian Miser."

"Jeff," Abed said. "We're doing this for your own good. If you go off by yourself with that kind of attitude something horrible is bound to happen to convince you that Christmas is worth celebrating. Do I really need to quote every Christmas Special ever?"

Without responding Jeff tried to fake left and then right in an attempt to get, by. When that didn't work he cupped an ear and widened his eyes dramatically.

"Wait a minute? Guys? Do you hear that? I think I hear sleigh bells!"

"What?!" Troy said and looked around, providing just the distraction Jeff needed to plow past him.

Once clear Jeff took long strides that he knew only Abed would be able to keep up with. After a few seconds he glanced over his shoulder to see them all glaring at him, but not following. Troy particularly looked hurt, even on the verge of tears.

"Fine!" he shouted. "Go ahead and leave! But you better learn your Christmas lesson fast! This is the first year I'm 'observing' Christmas and I don't want to wait until your heart grows three sizes before I can open my presents!"

"Jeffery!" Shirley shouted. "If you walk out now don't bother joining us tomorrow morning! Because we will ignore you!"

"Yeah!" Britta said. "Thanks for ruining Christmas!"

Jeff turned to flip them off but his eyes caught Annie's, rimmed red, just like Troy's. But he had been around her enough to know that it was more out of near rage than out of sadness. He tightened his jaw and took the corner. He didn't care what she or Abed, or any of them thought at this point. If he had to play the role of Scrooge to get away from this, then so be it, Bah humbug!

If it weren't for garish frilly bedspread, or the creepy mirror set up right above him, Jeff would have thought the four poster bed was exactly where he wanted to sleep.

At least in the dark room he could barely make out the aura of 'pink' that surrounded him. Pierce called it the Pink Room for obvious reasons. Pink carpet, pink wallpaper, a pink fireplace complete with pink stocking on the mantle; there was even a pink cd player that only had a pink cd of Pink.

Of course of all the rooms Pierce could have put him in, this was the one he chose. Leave it to Pierce to be an even bigger asshat than usual on Christmas Eve of all times.

Jeff stoked the fire and sank down in the pink armchair. Deep down he supposed he deserved it. Part of him still felt bad about everything that happened. Not a big part of him. But he couldn't deny that it existed. Maybe down in the cockles of his heart. If he even knew what the hell a cockle.

His window bumped with another gust of wind and Jeff turned and glared at it, just another reminder that he probably wouldn't get any sleep that night. At least not without getting completely soused. Which he normally wouldn't have a problem with but all he had was the Draino that Pierce called Serbian Whiskey; and the fact that being hung over the next morning would be make things even worse than they already promised to be.

After his fingers got nice and toasty, Jeff sat back and closed his eyes. He could already hear them all yelling at him and telling him how he was the worst, or that he Britta'd Christmas or even kicking him out of the group.

In the end he knew those wouldn't matter. The group would always forgive him, or at least bring him back into the group. He deserved that much at least didn't he? He'd lost track of how many times Annie had gone to bat for Pierce when he did things just as bad as knocking over a fifteen foot Christmas tree and possibly hitting Vicki with it. It would explain why Neil freaked out and tried to attack him, thus ending up smashing into the Nativity display.

Jeff pushed those thoughts out of his mind and managed to actually yawn. He reached down to the floor, just to the left of his armrest and scooped up the Pierce's bottle of Serbian swill. He downed a mouthful then clenched his eyes tightly when it burned its way to his stomach.

With that 'warming' experience to lull him to sleep, Jeff relaxed his eyes and sank deeper into the chair. Trying as hard as he could to fight way the hurt expressions he could still see on the faces of his friends when he stormed out of the laundry room. He hated it but he was so entirely sick and tired of all the fighting and of all the ruined Christmases. The bottle slipped from his fingers and clattered on the floor as he drifted to sleep.

The sound of someone stoking the fire woke him up. He could hear the poker dragging across burnt logs before the small 'clink' let him know that it had been put back in place. He worked on getting his eyes open while he heard his visitor sink into the chair across from him. With any luck it would be Annie or Britta, but he knew it would probably be Pierce.

Then he opened his eyes and stared into the face of a ghost.

"Winger," the ghost said and Jeff's eyes widened as he tried to deny what he was seeing. "Calm down Winger!"

"You're dead! Starburns… you're dead!"

"I know," Starburns tipped his top hat and sat back in his seat. "Dead and loving it!"

"This is impossible!" Jeff dug his heels onto the floor so he could get up and… run… fight? He wasn't sure which at this point. "We had a funeral! Abed has your ashes! There's a memorial plaque for you right next to the Luis Guzman statue!"

"Isn't it great?" Starburns sat forward with his hands on his knees. "I mean I knew that my death would tear apart the school but damned if you guys didn't go about it literally! Thanks for that Winger!"

Jeff shook his head and then rubbed his eyes. It was really him, it was really Starburns! Top hat, curly hair, groddy vest, and star shaped burns. Everything! But this was… Jeff still had the Starburns Tribute dvd Abed made! There had to be a logical explanation…then he looked down at the now empty bottle of Serbian Whiskey and the rather large burn mark it left on the floor when it spilled out.

"Wait… am I dead?" Jeff tightened his fingers on the armrest. It all made sense. He poisoned himself with that damn whiskey and died in the Pink Room and on Christmas Eve, how pathetic was that?

"Funny you should mention that," Starburns said. "You see the thing about being dead is that suddenly everyone finally appreciates you."

"No…" Jeff narrowed his eyes. He could feel his heart beating, he could feel the heat from the fire, and now that his senses were coming back to him, he certainly could see that Starburns was doing the same thing. "… Ok what the hell is going on here Starburns? You're alive!"

"Wrong," Starburns held up a finger. "I'm dead. The death certificate is signed and sealed and now everybody loves me again and the cops can't catch a deadman."

"I should have figured," Jeff said. "You faked your death and we all bought it hook line and sinker. Something's really are too good to be true."

"Now that..." Starburns said as he leaned to the side, just enough to retrieve a joint from his pocket. "...Isn't a very nice way to talk about the guy that's here to offer you the opportunity of two lifetimes."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jeff narrowed his eyes.

Starburns got up and held his joint to the fire until he could get a smoking ember. Then he leaned against the mantle and took a nice long puff. "I came back to Greendale about a month ago, and I've been watching both you and your little… study group. And I have to say Winger, I can empathize."

Jeff remained seated but glanced toward the door. The novelty of Starburns living and breathing was already wearing thin, he never liked the guy before and he especially didn't like the guy lighting up in his room. The last thing he needed was Shirley getting on him for smoking pot.

"See, that's what I'm talking about," Starburns said. "You're worried right now that your study group is going to get in a tizzy over one thing or another. And something you're not even to blame for. That seems to be your bag these days Winger. You go on living your life, trying to make these people happy. And do they ever appreciate it? No. Instead they make you the bad guy and constantly act like you're a douchebag."

In spite of himself Jeff leaned back and studied Starburns. The former Greendale student took another drag and smiled knowingly; Like Sylvester with a mouth full of Tweety. He couldn't decide if it was nice to see that Starburns really could empathize or creepy beyond belief that Starburns had watched him enough to know those things.

"In my 'past life', I was just like you Winger," Starburns went on. "I had my own click and I had my customers, and I tried to make everyone happy, and you know what I got for my effort? A whole lot of getting dumped on. I became a joke, nobody even called me by my name anymore, I was either Starburns, or Top hat guy, or Lizardstarhatburns. But never Alex. And then I was sold out to the cops. Nobody appreciated what I brought to the school. So then I had an idea…"

"You pretended to die in a meth lab explosion," Jeff said.

"Exactly!" Starburns jabbed a finger his way. "I thought, 'why be shackled by these chains I'm wearing now?' and you know what Winger? It worked. In life I was a joke, but in death I'm a legend! Starburns will never die! And the best part is I can see all the people that never gave me my due talk about 'Oh, this was Starburns favorite place to sell drugs.' Or 'Hey, remember that time that that blonde girl from Winger's study group made out with Starburns?' I'm a God!"

"Okay," Jeff stood up. "It's really great and all that you enjoy seeing people like you better when you're dead but I'm not one of them. So why don't you shove off and let me go back to sleep?"

"Because I want to offer you the same thing I got," Starburns said. "That study group you have? Those 'friends' of yours? You're the one that got them all together and now they stand around demanding things from you? Never appreciating you, leeching off you coolness! Or at least what you think is cool. You don't deserve that Winger, so why not give them what's coming to them and take that respect."

"You want to help me fake my death?"

"Think about it Winger, a fresh start, and all the love you know you're due!"

Jeff rolled his eyes. He really couldn't believe he was hearing this.

"Starburns, I've gone to this crappy school for three and a half years to get my degree. All so I could go back to being a lawyer. You think I'm just going to duck out at the end because I'm fighting with my study group?"

"I think that once you realize that the new you can be literally anybody, you're not going to care about that degree, assuming you even get it. I heard what the dean said. 'A shortened year'. 'May not graduate'. Seems like Greendale is doing a fine job of keeping you from your goal by itself."

Without realizing it, Jeff swore under his breath. How the hell did Starburns keep managing to make good points!? This wasn't the way of things! Before the guy faked his own death he was nothing but the obtuse, grimy, gimmicky version of Jeff Winger! Now he was making a credible case for dying!

"Look," Starburns said. "All I'm saying is to think about it. I feel for you man, I really do. You probably like those people, hell I know you like the blonde and the brunette! But they don't seem to like you all that much and this way you can make them realize how much they really are missing out on."

Nearly every instinct was yelling at Jeff to tell Starburns to go plug the hole he crawled out of, but at the same time he could still see the way they all looked at him when he left. He could still remember all the times they threatened to kick him out or actually did kick him out when they were the ones being completely unfair.

In the end he answered the only way he could.

"I'm not saying yes," He approached Starburns. "But I'm not saying no either. You want me to consider it, I will, but first I want to know what's in it for you?"

"Can't a dead guy just want to help another guy out?"

"Sure, but not you. What do you get out of it?"

"Well…" Starburns said. "I'm going to be the one helping you pull this off. I would expect to get paid for my services."

"What? People don't trust a dead drug dealer?"

"No, they just don't trust one they don't know," Starburns said. "But we'll talk about my fee later. Here's what we'll do. I got three guys. They helped me fake my death and build my new identity. They'll each meet with you tonight, they'll tell you all you need to know about creating your new identity's past, how to survive as a new man in the present, and how to fake your death so none of those ingrates come looking for you in the future. When they're done you can decide if you want to go through with it and we'll fake kill you then and there."

"Wait…" Jeff said. "Tonight? I'm supposed to decide if I want to fake my death tonight? That's a little short notice don't you think?"

"I'm only in town for this last night," Starburns shrugged then grabbed a nearby pink, porcelain figurine of a kitten and stuffed it in his pocket. "So it's gotta be tonight. Think of it as a Dickens' Special."

Jeff shook his head then sniffed the air. Maybe they were pumping monkey gas into his room and he was hallucinating again. That might explain how completely insane and stupid this all seemed. But Starburns started toward the door, apparently thinking he'd sold Jeff on the idea.

"Just think about how much you hate your life is now," Starburns grabbed the doorknob. "And think that it doesn't have to be this way."

"Sure," Jeff said, grabbing the poker and pushing some logs around with it. "Whatever you say Starburns."

"I'd say my name is Alex, but that's not true anymore. It's Stompy Von Asskick. Later Winger."

The door clapped shut and Jeff finished with the fire before facing the door and empty room around it. No evidence that Starburns was ever really there or that their stupid conversation ever took place. Except… except one thing…

There, in the middle of the floor, sat Starburns top hat. As if he left it so Jeff wouldn't doubt that the entire exchange actually took place. Jeff rolled his eyes, took a few steps backward, then plopped down on the four poster bed.

In spite of it being pink and frilly, Jeff could already feel sleep creeping back into his eyes. He reached up and fumbled about until he caught the cord attached to the curtains. With a sharp tug he drew he curtains around the bed and just as swiftly he fell fast asleep, dreaming of a new life.


	2. Into the Cave of Frozen Memories

He couldn't say how long he slept. When he first opened his eyes he thought it might have been all night as he could see light through the gaps in the curtains. But after a couple of seconds of blinking, the lights clearly looked to be coming from some sort of flashlight or the like. He couldn't be sure, but his thoughts immediately turned to his previous conversation with Starburns. The first of his three 'friends'?

Jeff searched around for something hard or blunt to use. He had no idea who this was, but chances were, that anybody that Starburns knew and was willing to help someone fake their death; probably wasn't the nicest of guys. Jeff needed to be prepared.

Just between a gap between the curtains, at the corner of his bed, he spotted a basket full of umbrella's and canes. After paying a quick glance at the light, Jeff leaned over and eased his hand through the gap, just enough to clasp the nearest cane… and slid it out. Unfortunately, whoever held the light must have seen the movement, because it shown directly on his hand as he pulled the cane into the bed with him.

Jeff cursed under his breath and managed to get on his feet, holding the cane like a samurai warrior. With his luck the guy behind the curtain would be massive and have a gun, and there Jeff would be, in his underwear, holding a cane above his head.

A hand appeared at one of the curtains and Jeff tightened his grip around the cane. Without realizing it he held his breath and adjusted his feet so he could really get in a good blow. The curtain flew open and Jeff swung. Which would have worked fine if the springs under his feet hadn't chosen exactly then to give out and trip him up.

Instead of clobbering his intruder in the head, Jeff wound up laying at his feet in a heap of pillows and blankets. He turned himself around just in time to get a light in the face. Jeff shielded his eyes with his hands as he desperately tried to get a look at the intruder.

"Got to say Winger," a very familiar and refined voice said. "You've looked better."

"Duncan?" Jeff narrowed his eyes as the light moved away and he made out the face of the man standing over him.

"In the flesh… or rather I'm the 'Ghost of Christmas Past' woooooooohhh!"

Duncan helped Jeff up and then held his lantern up a little higher.

"Why don't you go get some clothes on, It's kind of uncomfortable in here with you standing around in nothing but your pants."

Jeff glared at the man but moved over to the side of the bed so he could retrieve his… pants… or trousers… or whatever the hell the british called them. As he dressed he kept glancing over at Duncan and shaking his head. The 'Ghost of Christmas Past'. Starburns really was taking this 'Dickens Special' seriously wasn't he? Though Jeff never would have pegged Duncan as the 'Ghost'.

"So how'd you get involved with Starburns?" Jeff said. "He offer to take the rap for your latest DUI?"

"Very funny Winger," Duncan said. "But the simple fact of the matter is that a Professor at Greendale doesn't exactly get paid top dollar. I found that some of my previous experience comes in handy for those looking to forge a new identity or stay in the states."

"So let me get this straight," Jeff pulled his shirt on. "You know all about forging identities and you couldn't have helped me out when I started at Greendale to get me a new degree or something like that?"

Duncan wandered over to the chair Jeff had fallen asleep in and examined the near empty bottle of alcohol. After shining the light over it he apparently decided that it wasn't worth his time to imbibe the remaining contents and turned back to Jeff.

"Jeff, when are you going to learn that some things in life you actually have to earn? I felt that you would benefit from your experience at Greendale, and I believe that you have; in large part thanks to me."

"How do you figure that?" Jeff pushed his feet into his shoes.

"When you came to Greendale you were a slimy, amoral, shallow, ex-lawyer… and while you're still all of those things, at least you're conflicted about it now," Duncan said. "And none of that would have happened if I hadn't guided you to stay with your Study Group."

"Ignoring your deluded version of the events," Jeff said. "If I made so much 'progress' then why are you here to help me fake my death and create a new identity?"

"Starburns pays well," Duncan shrugged. "Just because I think you should learn some moral character doesn't mean I think I need it."

"You're one of a kind Duncan," Jeff shook his head. "So we going to do this or not?"

"Why not," Duncan said and tossed Starburns' hat to Jeff. "Come along Winger, we have to give you a new past."

"Where we going?" Jeff examined the hat then looked up at Duncan.

"To the Cave of Frozen Memories!" Duncan held the lantern above his head and waggled his free hand melodramatically. Jeff rolled his eyes and Duncan glared at him. "Oh just shut up Winger, and follow me."

Duncan took one step then turned around and gave Jeff a once over. "Put on the hat."

"What?"

"Put on the hat."

"Are you kidding me?" Jeff said. "I should throw this hat in the fire! It's been on Starburns head!"

"Sorry Jeff, but that's a term of the agreement tonight. You wear the hat or I don't teach you what you need to know."

Jeff sighed and put the hat on his head and did his best to ignore the smug look on Duncan's stupid face. This really better had been worth it.

Together they made their way through the halls of Hawthorne Manor. Every time they turned a corner Jeff worried that they would run into a member of his study group. Things would be awkward enough anyway without having to explain what the hell he was doing out in the middle of the night with Professor Duncan, wearing a top hat.

Luckily they made it to their destination without seeing so much as a single person. And soon they were entering some secluded room covered in Hawthorne family portraits, including a massive one of Pierce when he was thirty… and wearing all leopard print. Below all the portraits were rows and rows of photo albums and document folders. Including a couple that were entitled "Perry Lesbian Evidence" and "Winger Gay Files". Jeff did his best to ignore it as Duncan meandered over to some cabinets.

"So what is this place?" Jeff said.

"This is the Hawthorne Chamber of Records," Duncan said. "I've been coming here for years to get the things I needed."

"What?" Jeff narrowed his eyes as he wandered closer to the cabinets Duncan was working on opening.

"Now before we begin," Duncan said. "Why don't we take a moment to consider why you want to end your life and start a new one?"

"Instead," Jeff grabbed the handle of the nearest cabinet and pulled it open. "We skip your hackneyed psychoanalysis and just get on with it."

"Have it your way Winger," Duncan shrugged. "But it is something you'll need to confront eventually. Is your life right now really that bad?"

"I never said I even wanted to go through with it," Jeff said. "Starburns said you would convince me."

"Of course he did," Duncan sighed. "Jeff, take a look around you. On the walls, on the bookshelves, and in these files are generations worth of memories. Say what you will about the rampant racism, the Hawthornes kept extensive records to prove their pureblood ancestry."

"And that does what, except ensure them the right to call everybody else a filthy mudblood?"

"The point is, these aren't just pictures in a frame or names on a page. They're people's memories, some good, some bad. You'll be leaving your own behind and stealing someone else's. That isn't something to do casually. Think of all the Christmas's that you'll be stealing."

Jeff gave Duncan as sidelong glance as he approached a photo album entitled 'Christmas '09'. Before he could open it, he heard a sharp clicking followed by a light firing from the opposite side of the room. When he turned to it, he saw Duncan standing behind a projector, aimed right at the wall.

"What's this?" Jeff stepped away from the wall and over to Duncan.

"Visual proof about what's to happen," Duncan said as Jeff stood along side him. "This is Christmas, 1945, the Allies had just one the war, the United Nations was formed, and Pierce Hawthorne was celebrating his sixth Christmas."

Jeff crossed his arms as he looked at the film that was well older than himself. On the wall he saw a group of men, women, and children surrounding a massive Christmas tree… covered in what looked like KKK symbols. Apparently keeping the holiday 'classy' was a Hawthorne family tradition.

After a couple minutes of searching the various black and white faces, Jeff gave up and looked to Duncan. "Which one is Pierce?"

"He's about to come on," Duncan said as a young six year old with one of the widest smiles Jeff had ever seen jumped in front of the camera.

Young Pierce tugged at his bowtie and then began dancing the jitterbug. This lasted all of ten seconds before an old man, probably his grandfather, slapped him upside the face and pointed at the corner. Jeff glared at the long dead man then chided himself for actually feeling a little bit of sympathy for Pierce.

"The Hawthorne's had an old family tradition," Duncan said. "Nobody got to open presents until the entire family was there. Pierce is waiting for his dad to come home."

"Is he out shooting the Yule Elephant?" Jeff said.

Duncan didn't respond but the film cut out for a second before coming in at apparently a different time. Young Pierce sat in his chair, swinging his legs back and forth with his presents sitting literally a half inch out of arm reach. His mother hovered nearby talking to him and pointing at one particular package or another before leaning down and kissing him on the cheek.

And then Pierce's head perked up and all heads turned off camera. Pierce jumped out of his chair and ran out of view. The camera man panned over to follow him until the young boy reached the door. Pierce jumped up and down in anticipation for his dad to walk through the door and Christmas to begin.

Then the door opened but Pierce's horrible dad didn't walk through, instead it was someone else in a dark suit. He nodded down to the boy then approached Pierce's mother, slipping off his fedora as he spoke to her. Her brows knit together in frustration and anger… off in the corner, Pierce stood with an uncertain look on his face.

The man left and Pierce's mom dipped herself a large cup of eggnog and downed the entire thing, before turning to the camera and saying something to the cameraman. The picture faded into blurriness before refocusing again, as if the cameraman had left it momentarily to speak with Mrs. Hawthorne.

It focused in on Pierce, standing by himself by the door. The camera had landed right on him, in just the way it needed to, to show the young boy's devastated eyes and down turned lips. Jeff felt himself grow still as he looked young Pierce in the eyes.

Because in the blink of one of those eyes, he wasn't looking at Pierce, he was looking at himself. He was seeing his sixth Christmas when instead of opening presents, they went to local bars looking for his dad. Or his eighth Christmas, the one his dad promised would be different, and his dad took all of their presents before they could open them and gave them to a loan shark.

Jeff recognized the look on Pierce's face all too well, and on the face of Pierce's mother as she struggled to find a way to make this better for her son but didn't know how. A face mixed with equal parts fury and sadness.

"Why the hell are we watching this?" Jeff finally said to Duncan.

"Because," Duncan said. "This is what Christmas was for you, and me, and countless other kids. All of us have memories we want to get rid of. Changing your identity means you finally get to put those behind you. If you agree to it, we'll be taking documents from one of Pierce's dead relatives and making them yours. Tell me Winger, how many Christmas's did you have like this? Are you ready to throw them away?"

Jeff stared at the wall with Pierce one last time before turning to the nearest cabinet. "Turn it off and find me the right documents."

"So it's agreed?" Duncan turned it off and reignited his lantern. "You're ready to become someone new, with better Christmas memories?"

"I'm not saying no," Jeff said.

"Alright then," Duncan said and pulled out a manila envelope. "I've already taken the liberty of taking the records from Thaddeus Hawthorne Esq. Pierce's Great, Great Uncle. A lawyer, just like yourself, no doubt something you'll find useful… assuming of course that you'll want to be a lawyer in your new life."

Jeff snatched the envelope from Duncan's hands and scanned it, noting the dates of birth and social security number issued very late in this man's life… very long life. There were medical records too, which Jeff assumed would be his… which meant he would survive getting shot in a duel and cholera. He cast a skeptical eye at Duncan.

"Don't worry Winger," Duncan said. "I'll update everything so that it matches the modern era, this is hardly the first time I've done this."

"Which leads to the obvious question," Jeff said. "How many times _have_ you done this? Seems you could have saved yourself a lot of trouble when I got you out of that DUI if you just could have made a new you."

"Well of course I could have!" Duncan said and gestured toward the door waiting until Jeff followed. As he passed him he yanked the envelope back in his hands. "But unlike you, Winger, I don't believe in running from my problems. So I stuck it out and paid the price."

"You paid me to convince a jury of your peers that it's considered polite in England to kiss a police officer on the mouth and offer him a 'banging' time in the back of the vehicle you just plowed into a public fountain."

"Don't forget the chalupas." Duncan pointed at him.

"And the chalupas," Jeff said as they moved into the hall.

Together they made their way back to Jeff's room. Duncan always hovered behind him with his lantern, spouting off various psychological reasons why it would be a bad idea to fake his death. All of which Jeff just ignored while he thought back to the many Christmases his father ruined, and the ones after when it was just his mom and him and the best she could do would be a Happy Meal toy and a sweater from his grandma.

Sure he'd always remember that but if he did steal an identity from one of Pierce's ancestors, he really could start fresh. He would never have to have a bad Christmas again. He'd never have to have any Christmas again if he didn't want to! He certainly wouldn't be in a position where _he_ was blamed for ruining Christmas.

Finally they reached his room. When the doors opened the fire now burned down to low embers and the only real source of light was Duncan's lantern. Jeff reached for the light switch but Duncan grabbed his hand and shook his head.

"Best not," he said. "We don't want anybody to know you're up and about. The less light the better."

"Whatever," Jeff said and moved over to his chair. "So what now?"

"Now… I have to go," Duncan said. "I have to tweak these documents and have them ready for processing tomorrow. I'll be pulling an all nighter thanks to your unfinished business Winger."

"I haven't even decided if I'm going through with it," Jeff said.

"Of course you have," Duncan said. "All your life you've taken the easy way out. Now, at the culmination of nearly four years of toil, why would you see it to the end? That's who you are, and as your friend, I have to say it was very predictable."

"Can we please stop with the lecturing?" Jeff turned from the chair and approached Duncan. "It only works if you have even a modicum of moral high ground and you forget I'm not one of your students, I know the real you."

"Just like I know the real you," Duncan said. "I'm the only one at Greendale that knew you before you came. And it doesn't matter how much you, at one point, convinced your little group otherwise; you haven't changed. You're still the man that cheats and steals his way to get whatever he wants. Which really makes your whole group really sad, because after four years, they still couldn't reform you. Not even the brunette with the boobs."

"Over the line Duncan!" Jeff marched up to him. "Maybe I don't change, but that group is made up of good people!"

"Good people you exploited to pass classes, but now that you don't need to get a passing grade, what good are they to you? They're the ones who judge you and make you feel like a turd... and here you only ever banged Britta… you never even pulled the trigger on Annie."

"That's it!" Jeff gave Duncan a shove. "Get out! You don't know me! Nobody here does!"

"And you don't know them-" Duncan said.

Jeff interrupted him by grabbing him and shoving him again. Duncan lost is balance and fell hard on the ground, leaving his lantern lying a few feet away from him.. Jeff loomed over him but Duncan scrambled to the door, breathing heavily and uttering british cuss words.

"I don't ever want to see you again Duncan!" Jeff said. "Consider that part of my new life!"

"Ah," Duncan grinned as he stood in the open doorway. "Then it would appear I was right."

Jeff lunged at the nearest thing he could find, Duncan's Lantern, and hurled it at him. Duncan yelped and ducked out of the way, leaving the lantern to shatter against the wall. Jeff rushed forward but Duncan was already halfway down the hall. Jeff huffed and slammed his door shut before stalking over to his bed and throwing himself into it.

"Damn Duncan," he muttered to himself as he tried not to think about the psychology professor's triumphant look and how close he actually got to the mark. He needed a drink, he needed sleep, but most of all he needed to get away from this life.


	3. Seize the Christmas Day

"Winger…" A new voice said. "Jeffery it's time to wake up."

Jeff cinched his eyes tighter, aware that someone had turned the light on; in spite of Duncan's previous warnings. Maybe the new 'ghost' saw the shattered lantern and thought better of it. Or maybe Jeff was just having a horrible dream and he'd wake up from his Greendale nightmare next to his wife… Scarlett Johansson.

"Jeffery!" The voice came again and Jeff thought he recognized it. "Come one Winger! You going to sleep all night!? It's time to seize the day!"

Jeff sat up straight in his bed. With the curtains open now, there was nothing stopping him, apart from blurry eyes, from seeing the owner of that voice. One he hadn't heard in over three years and one he would have never expected to hear tonight.

"Whitman?"

"Winger!" Professor Whitman sat in one of the chairs with his legs crossed. Jeff narrowed his eyes as he focused in on his former accounting teacher. Instead of the usual brown suit, the man sported a green and white Santa outfit, complete with a bag of gifts sitting at his feet.

"You're here to help me fake my own death?"

"I'll admit that I'm a little disappointed too," Winger said. "But it was either me or that clod Mike. And I felt that maybe, just maybe, I could help you get some perspective on this decision in a way that didn't involve threatening physical assault on your testicles."

"Great," Jeff rubbed his eyes. "I'll need to talk to Starburns about the guys he has on his team. They keep trying to talk me out of doing what their being paid to do."

"Don't worry Mr. Winger, I'm going to do exactly what I've been sent here to do," Whitman said and tossed him some clothes, including a fake beard and some glasses.

"What's this?" Jeff said.

"The first step in seizing your new life is to find a new persona!" Whitman said. "Preferably one that's a bit more affable and charming than your current one. As such, we will be interacting with those that may still be awake, we can't have you being recognized."

Jeff stared at the glasses and then at Whitman. "This is ridiculous."

"Well you better get used to ridiculous Mr. Winger, because faking your own death is not an easy endeavor and you'll have to go to ridiculous lengths to pull it off. If it wasn't such an inherently deceptive and cowardly act I might even suggest it to those that really wanted to live life!"

"Dear god," Jeff shook his head. "Please don't start quoting _Dead Poet's Society_ to me. I keep worrying you'll get stuck on a Robin Williams loop and go _Patch Adams_ on me."

"Patch Adams!" Whitman jabbed a finger his direction. "Now there was a guy that knew how to grab life by the horns! You'd never see him faking his own death!"

"I guess not," Jeff examined his clothes. "Just exactly who am I dressing up as?"

"Well as you can see from my attire," Whitman said. "I'm Father Christmas: The Greendale Edition. You'll be my trusty assistant Bork!"

That was when Jeff eyed the rainbow suspenders.

"Shazbot."

"What was that?"

"Let's get this over with."

It took Jeff a few minutes to put together the entire ensemble but when he was finished he was just glad, for possibly the first time in his life, that he didn't have a mirror. He refused to wear the suspenders but that didn't help things as he now wore some sort of stripped pajamas under a heavy robe, a full beard, and elf ears.

Whitman just grinned and handed him Starburns top hat and the cane he'd earlier used to bludgeon Duncan with. Everything he needed to complete the ridiculous picture.

"There, now no one will recognize you."

"Promise me that," Jeff said.

"Don't worry Winger, your precious reputation won't be damaged by this get up. Come along."

And so together, they left the room, with Jeff doing his best to not itch at the spirit gum that held his beard on. Every now and again, as they walked through the halls, Jeff would spy a picture frame and catch a glimpse of himself. It was now that he really had to start doubting his sanity. No sane person would do all of this just to fake his own death! And Whitman couldn't really be a part of it could he?

"So why are we going out in these ridiculous disguises again?"

"Everyone who starts a new life tries to go back and 'see' what their old one would have been like," Whitman said. "Everyone. So it's necessary for you to have practice at not being recognized. Also I think tonight will serve as a bit of a preview."

"And you know all of this how?"

"I've helped arrange more than a few new lives," Whitman said. "Actually one I'm sure you know about. Professor Slater."

"Michelle?" Jeff stopped in his tracks. "But she didn't fake her death!"

"No, she just 'went missing'."

"But Michelle loved her job at Greendale, she always went on and on about how it was statistically the best place for her to be!"

"Yes," Whitman said. "And then she publicly declared her love for you and you chickened out on making your choice."

"Oh come on Professor Whitman," Jeff said. "That's hardly fair… she and Britta were in that stupid fight and put me on the spot. And didn't you encourage me to go for Britta anyway?"

"Of course I did," Whitman said. "But anything would have been better than what you did. Not giving either of those lovely ladies and answer. Britta, as I understand it, still remained with your group and had a support system. Slater was left with nothing but humiliation and Professor Duncan constantly calling her and asking if she had any confessions for him. She eventually decided that a new life was necessary. And all because you could not seize the day and make a proper choice."

"Technically I did seize the day," Jeff said. "After that incident I went out and kissed Annie on the lips."

"Did you really?" Whitman's eyes lit up. "And what happened since then?"

"Um… nothing," Jeff muttered, suddenly realizing that he was just further painting himself in the corner with that little incident.

"Nothing," Whitman shook his head. "Nothing about sums up your academic career and Greendale doesn't it? Not one degree attained, not life lesson learned, not one meaningful relationship realized. Were Christmas not the most wonderful time of the year I would weep for you."

"What do you mean I don't have meaningful relationships?" Jeff said. "What about my study group?"

"How meaningful can they really be if you're willing to part with them for the rest of your life over one little fight?"

"But it's not just one fight," Jeff said as they approached a couple of large doors. "It's a long chain of fights and accusations, and back biting and mistrust! I actually put my heart and soul into celebrating Christmas with them this year! And look how they paid me back!"

"If you say so Winger," Whitman said and stuffed his bag of gifts into Jeff's arms. "Now, we're about to be seen by others. Please remember that you'll be acting as if you're dead to these people. Try not to give yourself away."

"Whatever."

Whitman sighed and threw the doors open. Jeff had expected maybe a few night owls having Christmas drinks, but instead he was greeted with the sight of a holiday party in full swing! Pierce's sound system had been destroyed in the night's previous commotion but Abed had cleverly put his cell phone in an empty glass and used that to amplify his Christmas playlist so everyone could sing and dance to it.

All around them the party went on in full swing. Annie and Britta helped Vicki redecorate the tree, Troy and Abed were busy cutting out snowflakes with Magnitude. Pierce stood off by the eggnog with Leonard and Shirley busied herself by walking in and out of the kitchen with her Christmas oven mitts on and a wide smile on her face. And at the center of a group of merry students, the Dean danced some sort of Christmas jig.

"What the hell is this?" Jeff said.

"Christmas!" Whitman said before bustling into the room with a loud 'ho ho ho!'

"Merry Christmas/Hanukah/Ramadan/Kwanza!" Witman bellowed in rapid succession.

The crowd cheered 'Happy Holidays' back and clapped. Whitman bowed and took the bag from Jeff, declaring he had a gift for every good girl or boy that seized the day. Jeff threw up a little in his own mouth.

The partygoers surrounded Whitman and all but ignored Jeff. Which was fine as far as he was concerned. He was able to step back and watch as Pierce actually grabbed people by the shoulders and shoved them aside so he could get to his Christmas gift ahead of everyone else. Apparently some things never changed.

After the crowd dispersed a bit and separated into their own groups. Shirley reappeared with a tray full of fresh baked cookies. Jeff slipped past a few students to get nearer as she moved to the small spot by the tree where the study group now gathered in a friendly circle.

"Holiday cookies are done!" she beamed. "I shaped one specifically for what the season means for you!"

"Nice!" Abed approached the tray then blinked at it. "That's Rudolph wearing a turban."

"And Frosty carrying a New World Edition bible?" Troy said.

"Just trying to make the obvious holiday we're celebrating tonight more comfortable for you who want to pretend it's about a different one." Shirley said.

"Oh!" Annie picked up a dreidel shaped cookie. "Thank you Shirley! There isn't even a hidden message that if I eat this I've converted to your church!"

"Mine's Buddha arriving on a meteor!" Pierce said. "You know Shirley, I know many members of my faith that would pay top dollar for cookies like these!"

"You do?" Shirley beamed.

"Yes! I'll bet you could get five energon cubes per cookie for these things!"

"Wonderful…" Shirley said.

"Why is my cookie Santa?" Britta said. "And why does he have horns?"

"That's not Santa," Abed said. "It's Charles Darwin."

"Oh… makes sense."

"What about that blob of half baked cookie dough and M&M's?" Andre said.

Shirley's features visibly tightened and she gave a small 'hmm' before she looked at the cookie. "Well that one, was meant for Jeff. And it represented everything he believed in. Nothing."

The rest muttered in agreement and Jeff glared at them through his fake bushy eyebrows. And here he was wondering if he'd miss them if he ever decided to go through with it. They were making the choice easier by the second.

"Well he's not here so I'll just have his cookie," Pierce said but Annie slapped his hand as he reached for it.

"You know…" Annie said. "Maybe we should go get Jeff. It's not fair that we're all having fun and he's off probably drinking himself into the New Year."

"He can plug a hole for all I care," Pierce said.

"I'm sorry…" The dean suddenly appeared. "I thought I heard you saying something about me."

"We're just talking about Jeff," Abed said.

"Oh… _that_ guy," the Dean's face soured and Jeff raised a brow. "If you ask me this party is better off without him."

"What?" Britta said. "I thought you out of anyone would have wanted us to have patched things up with him by now."

"Normally yes," the dean said as his voice cracked a bit. "But a guy can only be hurt so many times…"

The dean's voice faltered and he retreated to the punch bowl. The group exchanged meaningful glances. Whitman, having delivered all of his gifts, now hovered close by. Jeff did his best to ignore him and look at his former friends.

"See," Annie said. "Even the dean is hurt about Jeff, we really should get him."

"We most certainly shouldn't," Shirley said. "That's why we're celebrating Christmas right now, in the middle of the night. So he can't try and weasel his way into our good graces tomorrow morning when he realizes all the fun he's missing."

"Yeah," Troy nibbled at his cookie and slipped his shades on. "We should get back to it. I'll just take this extra cookie… for research."

Annie snatched the cookie off the plate before Troy could get it. "Jeff, screwed up… and I haven't entirely forgiven him for what he did tonight, but he deserves to have his Christmas cookie. I'll hold it for him until then. So why don't we just… open our Secret Santa gifts in the mean time?"

The others uttered their own agreements and soon the study group was fumbling under the tree for their presents. Jeff found himself backing up a bit more now, not feeling too keen on the idea of sticking around for what he knew was coming. Still, it was hard to not watch Troy as he went through the act of 'observing' Christmas. Stealthily snapping pictures with his phone, recording notes in the microphone he had Abed rig into his sleeve. Jehovah would be pleased with the results of Agent Barnes.

"Secret Santa, I like it!" Whitman clapped an arm around Jeff only to get a glare for his efforts.

"I would think that someone like you would find people storming out to department stores, fighting over gifts and generally surrendering themselves to greed, distasteful."

"I find what you described reprehensible," Whitman said. "But that's not what gift giving is about. Did you not learn anything in my class? You don't measure a gift by its price tag. You measure it by its intent and thoughtfulness. A heartfelt gift, be it a kind word or a good book, can say I love you just as poignantly as an impassioned sonnet."

"Huh," Jeff said and wandered toward the eggnog. "So it looks like nobody has recognized me. Lesson learned right?"

"Oh I think there may be a few new lessons to learn," Whitman said as he stared at the study group, now busily opening presents.

Jeff glanced over his shoulder and his eyes fell on Annie, quietly sitting, watching the others unwrap their gifts and reveal who received from whom. So far Troy had gotten his gift from Pierce and Abed was opening his from Shirley. Britta opened hers from Annie, and Pierce still struggled to get Abed's gift open.

But Annie sat by herself, with a content smile on her face, and just the slightest hint of anticipation on her face. As the presents got unwrapped, Jeff couldn't help but notice the way the corners of her smile crooked down just a little as she realized that she wasn't getting a gift at all.

"Oh I forgot!" Britta said and then looked up, past Annie. "Dean! Come here!"

Jeff glanced around from the dean for a second before jumping just a bit when he realized the Dean had been standing right next to Whitman and himself. The dean grinned and ran to the group. Britta reached under the tree and handed him a present.

"I forgot that we put you in our gift pool so it would be even," Britta said.

"That's right!" The dean said before his face darkened just a bit. "I got Jeff, but he won't be here to get his gift."

"A hand held video game where I get to beat up my dad!?" Pierce jumped in as he held the device, with just a few strips of wrapping still stuck to it. "Ay-bed! How did you know?"

"Just a hunch," Abed shrugged.

"Um…" Annie leaned up on her knees just a bit. "Does anybody see anything for me?"

The others instantly stopped their unwrapping, thanking, or comparing and turned to Annie, then the tree, then Annie again. It was almost as if a spotlight had fallen on her and evaporated all the Christmas cheer around them. Jeff slid off a little bit to the side, just so he didn't have to see Annie's face, though he couldn't escape the look Whitman was giving him.

It was Britta that spoke up first.

"Damn you Jeff Winger."

"Guys… its okay," Annie said and Jeff cringed just a bit. "It really is…"

"The hell it is!" Shirley said. "I can't believe he would really be that selfish!"

"What I can't believe is that we all keep falling for it," Troy shook his head.

"We're not being fair," Annie said. "He's had a really rough year."

"We've all had a rough year," Britta said. "And I believe in Christmas stuff even less than him and I still got the dean a present!"

Jeff shook his head and eyed the door, only to have Whitman step in front of his view.

"No present for Ms Edison huh?" he said.

"I got her a present," Jeff muttered and fumbled for his wallet. "See!"

Jeff slipped out the generic gift card and handed it to Whitman. The professor eyed it for a second then did a 'thumbs down' and blew a raspberry.

"I really shouldn't have been surprised," Whitman said. "You would get such a lovely lady such an uninspired gift."

"It's the most expensive one!" Jeff snatched the card back. "It's not like this is a five dollar Starbucks card! She'll be able to get all sorts of stuff with this!"

"What sort of stuff?" Whitman said.

"I don't know…" Jeff said. "Stuff that she likes… books and things."

"You don't even know," Whitman shook his head. "This is a young lady that apparently meant something to you and you couldn't even be bothered to actually put some thought into finding her something that would make her happy. I sorely hope that in your next life you actually attempt to live a real life as opposed to the one you have now."

"Look," Jeff said. "I'll admit that sometimes I don't think hard enough about my friends, but when you get down to it, that's what friends are for, to accept you when you screw up. Right?"

"…but for how long?" Britta's voice fired out loud enough that it broke into Jeff and Whitman's conversation.

"…every year Jeff has put himself before the rest of us, and now he didn't even get Annie a present. Not even a crummy gift card!"

"It's not important," Annie shook her head. "Jeff… well… I mean it's not like he does this stuff on purpose."

"No," the dean said. "He just makes it a point to forget that he's surrounded by people that love him. Which makes it hurt even worse."

"Even I don't screw the pooch this much," Pierce said. "At least at Christmas time."

"He's got a point," Abed said. "Jeff has made each Christmas more difficult."

"What are you talking about?" Annie said. "Our first Christmas he celebrated along with the rest of us! It was wonderful!"

"Yeah," Troy said. "_After_ he made it all about himself and got the rest of us involved in his fight."

"Well what about last year?" Annie said. "None of us wanted to celebrate, but after we came down from Raddison's lyrical acid trip, he came along with all of us to celebrate."

"And none of that would have happened if he hadn't maliciously cease and desisted the other Glee Club, just because he didn't like them."

Annie sighed and rubbed her head. "Okay guys, but our second year. Yeah, he was the second one to ditch Abed's therapy, but he came back… he sang! It was magical. Remember the song? That's what Christmas is for! Remember?"

"Saying I love you-oooo" Jeff sang, just under his breath. Whitman raised a brow.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," Jeff said. "Something in my throat."

"Really because I sounded like-"

"A throat clearing…"

"And if any of that was selflessness that would have been awesome," Britta said. "But the only reason Jeff came back, was because after Abed ejected me from the Cave of Frozen memories, I went and found him and swore I wouldn't sleep with him again if he didn't come back and help fix things. Jeff is all about one person. The one he can see in that pocket sized mirror he keeps in his back pocket."

Jeff cringed again, not at Britta's slight, or the general accusatory tone of the entire conversation… but at the way he heard Annie's breath catch in her throat when Britta told her about the reason he came back to help Abed. And the way her body stiffened up at the revelation. He even took a step forward, but Whitman grabbed his arm.

"You're dead remember?" Whitman muttered but then moved in close enough so he could whisper. "But you know… if you were to run over there, and just… let your emotions fly… well that would really be something wouldn't it?"

"Sorry Annie…" Britta finally said.

The group muttered a few things amongst themselves before starting to break up. No one had any real smiles and Annie remained seated right where she was before. Jeff glanced at Whitman and tried to ignore the man's wide eyes, as if daring Jeff to break the 'dead' rule and run over to Annie. A true seize the day moment.

Before Jeff could make one move or another, Annie got up and shuffled over their direction. Jeff tried to make eye contact… maybe she would see him and just him being there would let her know that he… that he cared… or that he was sorry… but she didn't really look up. When she finally reached him she just muttered an 'excuse me' as she pushed past and dumped something in the trash can beside the eggnog table. Without another word she headed toward where Troy and Abed were talking about Inspector Spacetime together.

Jeff leaned over and looked in the trash can. He already knew what was in it, but for some reason, he just had to see for himself.

And so there it was, his pitiful cookie, sitting on a pile of used napkins and plastic cups. In the space of one night he'd apparently spent all the good will he had left with the one member of the group that he thought would have supported him. What was up with this holiday and making him feel like Pierce?

Whitman placed a hand on Jeff's shoulder, drawing his attention away from the trash can. The rest of the study group, along with the dean, had gathered around a pie Shirley had made, Andre gave a small toast and the group gave an appreciative laugh before digging into the pie.

"It would seem," Whitman said. "Apart from Annie, nobody really misses you when you're gone. And might I just add that this party didn't even really start happening until after you left."

"Yeah…" Jeff stared at his friends… or maybe they weren't so much after all. "Can we go now?"

"Follow me," Whitman said.

Together they exited the room, just in time for Jeff to catch a glimpse of Britta pushing Troy under the mistletoe. He turned away and put his back to the group… oddly remembering Troy and Abed's housewarming party, and how the group had come alive when he left to get the pizza. They seemed to get by just fine without him… and really when he thought about it. He tended to do just fine on his own, at least when he wasn't at Greendale. Something that wouldn't be a problem much longer.

Soon enough they stood at a door leading to the massive garage Pierce had always forbidden them from entering. Immediately Jeff knew why and hated Pierce just a little more. Row upon row of classic car, from a '57 Desoto to a Shelby Cobra… in fact Pierce even had the classic '60's Batmobile and the car from _Knightrider_, Jeff could scarcely imagine how crazy Abed would go for these things.

"Sooo," Jeff tore his eyes away from the cars. "What now?"

"Now Mr. Winger?" Whitman fitted some mitts on his hands and tightened his Santa hat over his head. "Now is where we part company."

"But I didn't learn anything," Jeff said.

"No, I suppose you didn't," Whitman tightened his belt. "And I don't suppose you ever will. You proved _that_ your first year at Greendale. So really, it all comes down to a choice. In your new life you'll be given the opportunity to make of it whatever you want. The question you need to ask yourself is this. Even if you would have the opportunity to attain everything in this house, in this garage, would it be worth giving up what you had in that living room with those people? Would your desire to have the best stuff outweigh any feelings of longing toward them? Or would _things_ be enough for you?"

"Well gee," Jeff said. "When you put it that way, and I forget every Christmas Special I ever watched, the answer is kind of obvious isn't it?"

"It is, isn't it?" Whitman approached the garage door. "Then why don't you act like it Mr. Winger? Do you love those people in there more than your old life? More than any new possible life?"

Jeff opened his mouth to answer 'of course' but he remembered his cookie thrown in the trash, he remembered all the bad mouthing, all the back biting, all the jealousy and insanity. Would he _actually_ miss those things? They certainly seemed to be getting on well enough without him. So why did he actually need them?

His eyes went to the cars and his memory wandered to attending swanky parties of his clients and bedding their wives. A life he gave up for clinging to Italian faucets for luxury and running himself ragged over paintball and chicken fingers. He could get that life back, his mistake four years ago, was trying to get it back the honest way.

"So which is it Winger?" Whitman said. "Stick around and lift up the life your currently living? Or slink off into a new life of your own choosing."

"You seem to have all the answers Whitman," Jeff said. "So you probably know mine. If my friends can't appreciate me enough to save me a misshapen half baked cookie… then what do I really need them for? I can always get new friends."

"So be it," Whitman said and the garage door opened behind him with a rush of cold air. As the door creaked open, a sleigh appeared, drawn by eight reindeer. Jeff tried to not look surprised but he was pretty sure that he failed.

"I'm off to visit a children's hospital and help them believe in Santa Claus!" Whitman said. "And Mr. Winger, you've wasted this life, please don't waste your new one."

"How have I wasted any of it except the last four years?"

Two figures popped up from the sleigh, Jeff thought recognized them but he couldn't be sure. All he could really see was that they were dressed as very mean elves. They snarled and gnashed their teeth at Jeff's direction but calmed when Whitman drew near.

"Take a good long look at these two," Whitman said. "Because in this moment they represent your life. They are Vanity and Selfishness. Beware them Jeff, for upon their brow is written the word 'Loneliness'. That is what you will be in your new life, just as you've always insisted on being in this one."

"Wait…" Jeff said. "Aren't those guys Pavel and Quendra? _They're_ Vanity and Pride?"

"It's a metaphor Mr. Winger," Whitman shook his head then mounted the sleigh. "How you ever passed my class, I shall never know."

That said, Whitman cracked the reins and the sleigh took off. A moment later the garage door slid closed, leaving Jeff in pitch darkness.


	4. The Coolest Stiff in the Cemetary

Jeff was alone in Pierce's massive car garage in pitch darkness, wearing a ridiculous costume. He shivered slightly then went to the door. His nice warm bed was calling to him. He would get back there and sleep maybe his last night as Jeff Winger away. He yawned and pulled the fake beard he wore. It didn't come off.

He tugged again and it just stretched his skin out. He took a deep breath and gave it a firm yank! Then he heard a 'riiiiip' and he gritted his teeth at the pain. When he looked down he realized he not only pulled off a good deal of his stubble with that gesture, he also only got the mustache and the beard off… the sideburns were still stuck tight.

Releasing another sigh he grabbed the doorknob and tried to twist it. Only to have it turn just enough to 'click' and let him know it was locked. Jeff jiggled it back and forth. It only clicked in protest.

Finally he slammed his body against the door. When it didn't budge he spat out a cuss word and kicked the door. Which led to more cussing and him hopping around on one foot. He glared at the door and cursed fine carpentry and hand carved mahogany.

He put a little weight on his foot but winced at the pain. Then his eyes spied the cane he had brought along as a prop and he grabbed at it. He would just have to go out the garage and go back in through the front door.

It took him a little while of fumbling around in the dark but he finally found the switch and the garage door started sliding open. That's when Jeff noticed a long shadow flowing from the widening crack of light the garage created. The figure of a man. Someone was standing right outside the garage.

"Whitman?" Jeff said. "Whitman if you're wondering if I changed my mind, you might as well turn around. Because as far as I'm concerned, death can't come too quickly!"

The moment his eyes fell fully on the person behind the garage door, Jeff regretted his words. It wasn't Whitman, or anybody else he'd ever want to meet in the dark and the cold. A thing right out of his nightmares a thing he knew would haunt him for the rest of his life…

"The Human Being?" Jeff said.

The Human Being nodded and Jeff shivered, not just from the cold but because it looked far creepier than usual. Someone… maybe even it… had changed the outfit and inverted the colors. Almost like a photo negative. Now it was all black with a white mouth, white eyes, and a white 'G' on its chest. Jeff by far preferred the icicles.

"Wait…" Jeff eyed the Human Being. "Are… are you here because of Starburns?"

It nodded.

"So you are the 'Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come'?"

It nodded.

"Which means you're going to pretend kill me…"

It nodded.

Jeff looked past it, to the windswept snowdrifts that now dotted the estate and the road further on. Part of him just wanted to make a run for it, but he had to consider that it might cause him to _actually_ die than to just fake it. Then he returned his eyes to the grim figure before him and noticed the snowmobile.

"Wait… are we going somewhere?"

It nodded.

"Dammit," Jeff looked at his clothes. "I can't go out like this!"

The Human Being held out its hand and pointed. Its shadow led the way to a nearby coat rack, where a heavy wool coat hung, along with a scarf.

"Better than nothing," Jeff muttered as he went over to coat rack.

But on his way there he managed to step on his injured foot wrong. In an instant he slammed his cane down, which would have worked if it hadn't landed on a patch of ice. Before he knew it he was on the ground and his head was spinning. He glanced up to see the Human Being advancing on him. The last thing he saw before everything went black was the horrible grin on the Human Being's face.

The first thing he realized when he came to, was that he felt warm air on his face. For a moment, he feared that warmth belonged to the Human Being, breathing down on him.

Luckily that turned out to be wrong. Unluckily the truth was much worse.

"I'm at Greendale..." Jeff muttered as he sat up.

He narrowed his eyes when he actually looked down at himself. He wore the wool coat and scarf from the garage. Both of which, like the pajamas beneath, were covered in snow. Had the Human Being lugged him all the way to Greendale unconscious?

The shadow of the Human Being appeared to Jeff's right and he forced himself to ignore the heebee jeebees it gave him. How the hell did Starburns get mixed up with this guy? And who thought it doing fake murders was a good idea?

Jeff stood and brushed himself off. It took him a moment but he soon realized they were in the supply closet... Again, a place he never wanted to be at with the Human Being.

"So what now?" He said. "Do I get to pick which "accident" does me in? I was thinking it should be something awesome, like an explosion."

The Human Being merely pointed at the door.

As it turned out, Greendale was even creepier at night. With the lights put out, and each footstep echoing down the hall... Jeff could almost believe in actual ghosts with unfinished pen related business.

Of course, having the Human Being shadow his every step didn't help matters.

"How about a death involving the chicken finger fryer?" Jeff said. "That would be pretty memorable."

Naturally the Human Being said nothing.

Jeff nodded to himself and continued forward until they turned a corner. Far down the hall he spotted a pair of students. With the way they're voices echoed on the walls, he recognized them to be the Red Headed Student and Leonard... And by the looks of it they were going through his locker.

"You sure he's not going to miss this stuff?" The red headed student said?

"Positive," Leonard pulled one of Jeff's emergency shirts over his head. "I got a fat tip that Winger bought it tonight."

"Winger's dead?"

"That's what I heard."

"Awesome. These belonged to a dead guy."

"They're taking my stuff!" Jeff said to the Human Being. "They're going to get my expertly faded jeans! I have to go stop them!"

He didn't make it a single step before a surprisingly strong hand gripped his shoulder and pulled him back. The Human Being didn't say anything. It just slowly shook its head then waggled a finger.

"Right," Jeff said. "Dead men don't beat people up that take their stuff."

"Wait..." The red headed student said. "What about his group? Won't they come looking for his stuff?"

"Bah! Don't you follow twitter? They had a massive fight just before he croaked. They hate his guts. No one will miss these things! Now come on and help me get the loot to the truck. I got more of his things stored in another room."

The Human Being grabbed Jeff's hand and tugged him away. Instantly Jeff recoiled... Why did it have to touch him? He clenched his fists and glared at it. Apparently it got the message and merely pointed their new way.

Together they forged ahead and Jeff had to stop himself from pausing every few seconds and looking around. This would be the last time he would ever walk through Greendale. The last time he would ever have to smell that funny smell that came from the math lab. The last time he would have to see one of those weird random posters.

Shouldn't he be feeling awesome about this?

They passed by the Dean's offices and Jeff almost smiled as he remembered the times he helped Troy and Abed sneak in and pull pranks. Or when they discovered the cache of paintball supplies their second year.

A few more turns down the halls and they passed the cafeteria. Jeff almost stopped but kept right on going, even though he could remember countless lunches, squeezed together at one table. Sometimes so tightly, Britta or Annie would practically be on his lap.

What was going on with him? Did he really have to remind himself what a crap hole this was? The Math lab smelled like butt! The posters were probably all sex offenders! The cafeteria benches gave him cricks in his back!

He couldn't possibly be getting nostalgic! Not now! Not when he finally found an escape hatch!

He pulled the top hat a little tighter on his head and followed after the Human Being. He couldn't doubt himself now. His study group had all but abandoned him, Leonard was pilfering away his things… and somewhere Starburns was living the good life! The dean probably got him a Dalmatian themed male teddy for Christmas!

Then they passed the Study Room. Then he froze in his steps.

Even in the dark and the emptiness… this place somehow still seemed… nice. Jeff stepped in and swore that it was just a couple of degrees warmer than the rest of the building. He ran his hand over the scar on the table, left from when he attacked it with an axe. He had been so sure after that, that he didn't want to be alone in the world. What had changed?

He circled around, noting that Abed had put in a few more notches on the 'Classic Wingers' tally, and Troy's side was covered in notches. How many hours did he spend in this room? Talking, arguing, laughing, eating… having sex.

Once on Annie's side, he noticed a line of notches of her own. She'd scratched out what they were for, but Jeff found it odd that she would even have done it in the first place. Defacing school property wasn't her style. But… sometimes he had noticed her moving her hands down there… after they had exchanged one of their looks...

No! He couldn't get like this! He didn't want to have to wear a disguise just to see if they actually did miss him! If he just blocked them he wouldn't have to. He could do this!

He glanced up at the Human Being, standing silently in the doorway. Just watching him and waiting for him. He pulled his coat a little tighter around him and stepped forward.

"Okay, let's get this over with."

The Human Being left first, and Jeff followed behind. Try as he might, he couldn't help but cast one last spare glance back at the study room, feeling his stomach sink as he gazed at it. The last time he would ever see it…

A door ahead opened wide and the cold winter air rushed in. They were going outside again. Jeff adjusted his scarf and stuffed his hands in his pockets and forged ahead, with each footstep sinking a foot down into the snow. The Human Being led the way until the pair of them came to the Luiz Guzman statue.

Jeff glanced over the quad, his eyes falling to where he had shared his first kiss with Britta. The time he was supposed to seize the day. Then he spotted the remains of Joshua's secret trampoline garden. Finally they rested on the spot, in front of the cafeteria, where he had kissed Annie after the Tranny Dance.

Then he looked at the Human Being, standing next to Starburns memorial plaque, and a brand new one, covered in snow.

This was really happening! He was really about to fake his death and create a new identity! He really never would see Greendale again, he really never would argue with his study group again… he really never would see if anything would happen with…

"Wait…" Jeff said. "Let's say… let's say I give this whole fake death thing a whirl and I decide I don't like it. I can always come back right? I mean there's no law or contract that stops me from coming back. So I could always come back to life if I wanted… right?"

The Human Being shook its head.

"What do you mean no?" Jeff said. "All night you guys have been trying to talk me out of this! Duncan! Whitman! Both of them were telling me it was a bad idea. Now that I finally agree you're saying it's too late!?"

The Human Being nodded.

"Don't give me that! I'm a lawyer! There's no legally binding document! Nothing telling me I have to go through with this! My fake death isn't set in fake stone!"

The Human Being stretched out his hand and brushed away the snow from the new memorial. Jeff felt himself shake at the sight of it. From the moment he saw it, he knew what it would say but… as long as you could always not say something or not see something you could deny it! But there it was, engraved in solid brass.

IN HONOR OF JEFFERY WINGER 2009-2012.

"No!" Jeff said. "I didn't sign up for this! I can't fake die right now! Don't you see!? I get it! I get what Duncan and Whitman… hell, probably all of you were trying to teach me! Every year we've set out to do something to 'save' Christmas, and each time the answer was the same! I just didn't really want to know it. Christmas is about family, and the Study Group is my family! Each year what made everything better… after all the crap and the insanity was coming together with them! I understand now! I want to live so I can show them that I know that now! I want to seize the damn Christmas Day! Human Being! Tell me that there's some way to avoid this! You all got this plaque here in the matter of a few hours! There's no way this wasn't planned to teach me a lesson! Tell me you can take it away!"

The Human Being lifted a hand up to his mask and peeled it back. Jeff's breath caught in his throat… he'd wondered who was under that thing ever since the dean created it… and now… for some reason, it was revealing itself to him, showing him who it had been all this time. The mouth got free of the mask and Jeff could make out a horrible grin.

"Of course it was to teach you a lesson!" An all too familiar voice said.

"No…"

The cowl came all the way back to reveal the horrible, grinning face of Chang.

"You never appreciate what you have until you're gone!" Chang bellowed and started cackling. His hands reached down and he brandished a snow shovel.

Jeff fell backward in the snow as Chang filled the empty quad with is maniacal laughter.

"No!"

"Jeff Winger! The coolest memorial plaque on the quad!"

"No!" Jeff cried out. "I'll change! I'll change!"

The shovel swung at his face and the last thing Jeff heard was Chang's laughter, ringing in his ears.

* * *

><p>It could have been a day, it could have been a year, but all Jeff knew was that… he wasn't dead. In fact his head didn't even hurt when he opened up his eyes. It certainly didn't feel like he'd been beaned in the face with a snow shovel by Chang.<p>

Jeff popped up. He was in his bed in the Pink Room. The curtains were drawn and the heater was running outside. Maybe it had all been a dream? Considering the fight he'd had with the study group that wouldn't be entirely surprising.

Then he looked down at himself. He still wore the pajamas, the coat, and the scarf. He felt up on his face, the mutton chops were still there. His hand continued upward until they struck the rim of Starburns' top hat. It had all happened! He had made a deal to fake his death with Starburns!

But the real question was… did the deal actually go through? And if so… how long was he out? Did they already do a funeral for him and then redeposited him here in the Pink Room? Was he fake-dead and not able to see his study group again?

Jeff threw the curtains open… the room looked exactly like it had before… except… except for the plaque he'd seen at Greendale. It was there. Sitting on the mantle. Jeff ran over to it and examined it. When he did his eyes widened and a smile lit up on his face. It was empty. His name had been scratched out! The deal hadn't gone through! He wasn't pretend-dead!

With a whoop and a holler Jeff leaped into the air and cheered like some character at the end of some cheesy 80's movie. Without even thinking about it he ran to the window and threw it open. He breathed in the crisp, clean winter air and looked over the mansions yards, with the snow drifts piled high. Then he spotted Garrett, stomping through the snow like he was on some sort of Alaskan expedition.

"You there boy!" Jeff shouted and Garrett looked up at him. "What day is it?"

"What do you mean what day is it?" Garrett's voice cracked as he shouted back. "Why it's Christmas Day of course!"

"Of course it is!" Jeff beamed. "They did it all in one night! I still get to celebrate with my friends… wait… my friends… Garrett! I need you to do me a favor! I have a gift to give and I need your help. If you can get it done in an hour I'll give you five bucks, get it done in a half hour and I'll give you dating advice!"

"You got it Mister!" Garrett said.

* * *

><p>Annie came into the main sitting room a little bleary eyed and groggy. They'd all stayed up a little too late. Mostly because of the Christmas Revenge Party that Shirley through and partially because her room was next to the dean's and she could hear him snoring through the vents. In fact, she would still be asleep if she hadn't smelled the Christmas breakfast that Shirley had been cooking.<p>

"Good morning An-nie!" Shirley said from the kitchen. "Happy Holidays!"

"Merry Christmas!" Annie smiled back.

"Merry Christmas Auntie Annie!" Elijah and Jordan ran over from the tree and hugged her.

Annie laughed and hugged them back, then smiled as she saw Britta holding a gift in front of Ben. She somewhat shuddered when she remembered what it was. She just didn't think Shirley would approve of '_Baby's first Origin of Species_'. But that was Britta's battle.

"Troy and Abed on Christmas Morning!" the familiar duet called from the other end of the room where they sat in their Christmas sweaters and did the Christmas edition of their show.

Pierce sat at the Hawthorne family piano and tinkled away at the keys, playing _Good King Wenceslaus_. He waved at Annie and she waved back before finally making her way to the coffee, thankfully pouring herself a cup and delivering herself a much needed caffeine boost.

"I think Father Winter brought us all gifts!" The dean said from the tree. "I know what I asked him for!"

"I'm sure you did," Annie said while she mixed in her sweetener.

She glanced out the window and had to smile at all the snow. Sure it had been trouble last night and prevented all of them from going home. But it was beautiful now… and it had led them to have a great Christmas party together. She couldn't really ask for much else.

"These gifts are going to be good!" the dean said. "Merry Happy everyone!"

Annie opened her mouth to answer but was interrupted by a loud 'Humbug!'

"Oh my God Jeff!" Britta said. "What happened to you?"

Annie spun around to see Jeff standing at the doorway… looking in every conceivable way like Ebenezer Scrooge. Top hat, big bushy sideburns, cane, heavy coat over pajamas, even a pair of spectacles; literally everything someone would wear as a Victorian man on a spirit quest. Had he slept on a bed of asbestos over the night?

"I don't know what you're talking about Britta," Jeff said as he walked in. "I woke up like this. Probably somebody's idea of a joke. Are you all having a good time without me?"

The initial shock of seeing Jeff dressed like he'd walked off the pages of one of the most famous Christmas novels quickly wore off and Annie felt the familiar anger she'd felt for him last night returning. She'd hoped that after sleeping on it he would have actually felt bad about trying to destroy Christmas last night and apologize. But it seemed like he was taking it to the next level, literally dressing up like a guy that hated Christmas.

"As a matter of fact we _did_ have a good time without you Jeff," Annie said. "And we'd like to keep having a good time. So if you'll excuse us-"

"I won't!" Jeff snapped. "Not until I've said my piece! Last night… all of you insisted I come and fix things and I refused because I felt like I deserved better treatment than what I was getting! I was putting what I wanted first. And after a long night… I've come to realize that you were all right!"

"That's great Jeff but if you could get your things and go… wait… what?"

"You were right!" a smile lit up on Jeff's face. "All of you! Every Christmas! You were right and I was wrong! I know we're not all Christians but we all like to celebrate Christmas together because that's what makes it special for us. I'm here, right now because I want to say I'm sorry… and I want to spend Christmas with all of you… my family."

"His heart grew three sizes…" Annie heard Abed mutter in the corner.

"Oh Jeff!" the dean burst forward, with tears streaming down his face. "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas dean," Jeff actually hugged the diminutive man back then looked to all of the rest of them. "Come on guys! Bring it in here!"

The study group all rushed forward and joined he dean in giving Jeff a massive group hug. Annie trailed behind, just a bit before she came in to and spread her arms around Troy and Abed's back. This was why they kept forgiving Jeff… for as douchey as he could be… he could apologize with the best of them.

"Jeff," Troy said. "You want to join Abed and me for the Christmas edition of our show?"

"Sure thing," Jeff said. "Just give me a moment too…"

"Jeff I'm making Christmas waffles!" Shirley said. "Do you want yours shaped like a 'J' or a 'W'?"

"A 'J'," Jeff said. "But I really need to-"

"Come open presents with us!" Jordan and Elijah said. "Aunt Britta has something really cool she says!"

"Maybe a bit later," Jeff said. "Right now I really want-"

"Jeff!" Pierce said. "I've got some special Christmas morning egg-"

"That's great Pierce!" Jeff said and looked around the room. "All of you! I want to spend some time together doing whatever you guys want. But right now I need to borrow Annie!"

"Me?" Annie raised a brow as Jeff clasped her hand.

"Yeah…" he said. "It will only take a minute. Come on!"

She barely had time to place her coffee cup down before he practically dragged her out the door. They got as far as the hallway before Jeff stopped and started handing her, her winter clothes. Annie looked around for any clue as to what was going on but all she saw was a creepy picture of Cornelius Hawthorne.

"Jeff… what's going on? Did you hit your head? It looks like you hit your head."

"I'm fine Annie," Jeff said then his brows lifted up a bit higher and he held up a finger. "Hold on… your right… something isn't right."

With that he ripped off the sideburns, grunting slightly as he did, but as painful as it sounded, Annie had to admit it was an improvement. Jeff turned back to her and tapped the pile of winter clothes in her hands.

"Go ahead and put these on, it's cold outside."

She couldn't help but give him a skeptical look for the first few seconds, she was getting a Goldblooming, monkey gassed vibe off of him. But his eyes actually looked earnest and even sparkled! What else could she do but start pulling on her winter gear and follow him outside?

Soon enough they were trudging through the snow. Around the corner of the mansion and straight on back to the rear. The entire time, Jeff clasped her hand and took shorter steps than usual, as if to make it easier for her to step in his tracks so she didn't sink so deep into the snow.

Finally they reached the backyard.

Annie couldn't help but grin when she surveyed Jeff's surprise.

There, sitting around a snow-table, were seven snowmen. Each decorated just a little to look like the study group.

Jeff gripped her hand just a little tighter and guided her over to the snowmen. Once they reached them Annie pulled her hand away and cupped it over her mouth. The snowmen were perfect! Abed's was thinner than all the rest, Britta's had straw to make her blonde hair, and Jeff's had an unusually large forehead.

She turned to her snow-woman and grinned as she saw it had a stack of snow-books sitting in front of it. Jeff came up behind her and placed his arm on her shoulder. Together they just stood and took in the entire group.

"I can't believe this!" Annie said. "You did all of this for me?"

"Well, I had help," Jeff said. "I know it's not that great a gift but…"

"It's wonderful!" Annie turned and looked up at him. "Jeff! I… I'm sorry… I really thought you'd forgotten and I…"

"No, I'm sorry Annie," Jeff said. "You know better than almost everyone what it's like to have a disappointing Christmas. You deserve to have a few good ones."

"Aw… Jeff… thank you!" Annie leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. "No one's ever gone to this much effort for me on Christmas."

"Well…" Jeff said. "I also got you a gift card…"

"Thanks for that too!"

The two of them stood in the snow for a few minutes longer before Jeff insisted that Annie stand with the snowmen so he could get pictures. She felt her smile just keep widening as he snapped shots with first his phone and then hers. Finally they were done and she could feel the tip of her nose stinging just a little with the cold.

"So before we go in," Annie said to him. "Just tell me one thing… what's with the Scrooge outfit?"

"You'd never believe me if I told you," Jeff said, taking her hand. "Let's just say it was a Dickens Special… and I'm glad it worked."

"Me too!" Annie squeezed his hand, just as a snow drift on the roof collapsed and dumped all over Jeff.

Jeff just shook his head. "You think I'll get in trouble if I say humbug to that?"

Annie laughed and then looked up. The snow hadn't fallen randomly. Instead she spied Professor Whitman on the roof with a wide grin on his face. Then she saw him hold out a rod with some mistletoe attached to some string. Annie raised a brow but Whitman just gave a thumbs up.

"Jeff," Annie motioned up at the mistletoe.

Jeff spotted the mistletoe and then Whitman. He shook his head then pulled Annie close. Merry Christmas Annie"

"Merry Christmas Jeff!"

She closed her eyes as he drew her in for the kiss… only to freeze up when she heard the window open and another snow drift dumped on them. She blinked through the snow to see the Dean poking his head out the window and waving his hand wildly.

"And God Dean us! Every one!"


End file.
